Nyns eus goon heb lagas, na ke heb scovarn

There is no down without an eye, nor hedge without an ear


The good-natured readers of the Roundup have always responded well to the call from pets in need. We hope that this week's three little chaps will also win your affection and engage your willingness to help.

Good home wanted for cute l'il pup!

Playful pup, "Gnasher", is just three months old and is already having to look for a new home.

Sadly, his mum and dad had to be put down because they attacked and killed their owner and his family.   

Rodney Bolitho (55) of Colinsey Road, Penzance was the last of the six in his family to die, but even as he was being savaged  by Gnasher's mum and dad - with little Gnasher doing his level best to try to help them - Rodney, a dog-lover till the end, cried out to the the armed police coming, sadly far too late, to the rescue, "They din mean nuthin' by it - they're sum good dogs really!", before  his windpipe was ripped out in a speedy act of canine surgical precision.

Police quickly despatched the two older dogs in a hail of bullets, securing only minimal injuries to themselves before the bullets took full effect.  Gnasher was stunned by the sudden shooting of his parents, as well as by the maniacal clubbing administered to him to get him to release a policeman's leg.

Given his young age and in view of Mr Bolitho's dying recommendation, it was decidd to give young Gnasher a second chance.  A loving home is now sought for Gnasher in the West Penwith area.  Animal psychologists have - at some considerable and safe distance - determined that Gnasher might well benefit from being placed in a home with young children to help him develop.

If you are interested, just 'phone the Roundup, speak to Tamsin and ask for 'Gnasher'.

Good Cornish Home wanted!

Sukhbataar, a 14-year-old Mongolian golf-hamster, has a handicap of just 5.  

He likes a good full Cornish cooked breakfast to set him up for the day and, as this pciture show, is probably the only professional golfer to play in the nude.  

As he insists, "Come on, mate!  My body's covered in fur, who's going to notice?  Anyway, out on the the course, all the eyes will be on my playing and not on my body!"

Sukhbataar can earn between £150,000 and £200,000 a season and so probably doesn't deserve to be called a pet.  However, he is fed up living out of a proverbial suitcase in hotels and wants a good Cornish home with proper cooking.

Interested parties should know that he has - and will bring along - his own cage equipped with his favourite wheel and expansive run.

If you are interested, 'phone the Roundup, speak to Tamsin and ask for 'Sukhbataar'.

Looking for love?

Timothy (12 and neutered) is a (former) male of refined tastes currently living with a caring family in a caravan just outside Madron.  

In perfect health, except for a slightly weakened right eye, for which he wears an appropriately corrective eye-glass, Timothy does occasionally feel the urge for female companionship, despite the drastic surgery he underwent long ago.

Timothy is fond of freshly boiled fish, the warmth of an open fire and the sound of Bach piano concertos, which he finds particularly comforting whilst licking his arse.  

He would like to meet a discerning female (feline or human) who would share his interests and give him the benefit of any sexual doubt.

If you are interested, 'phone the Roundup, speak to Tamsin and ask for 'Timothy'.

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